What Would Kate Middleton Do? Diet Edition.

It's clearly no secret that I'm completely obsessed with England's newest Royal, Kate Middleton. I think she is so well spoken, classically beautiful, and charming. I admittedly have a girl crush on her and want to be just like her (Prince and all, OBVI.) aaaaaannnnnd she's super skinny too. oops. #FAIL on my part. So I've decided that if I can look like her, I can catch a prince too. I've formulated my own no carb diet that will surely make me 5'9 and 108 lbs, just like Kate, and you all are coming along for the journey.

Day 1: 

8:00- I leave my house with hard boiled eggs, lettuce, carrots, low-carb yogurts in tow. Hungrymeter? 5. 

8:30- arrive at work, sit down at my desk can hardly wait to eat this 60 calorie yogurt. I'm so hungry, I think 60 will feel more like 120.

9:00- finish yogurt, am satisfied. 

9:30- ok i'm a little hungry.

10:00- ok i'm starving.

10:30- HOLY SHIT I have GOT to eat. Eat Hardboiled egg in no more than 3 bites.

10:31- omg only 119 minutes til I can eat again. 

10:31-12- thank goodness I had work to keep me busy. Whoever says water makes you not hungry.... WAS A LIAR.

12:00- fix a salad with italian dressing and 2 carrots. 

12:30- whoever said salad was a substantial meal.... WAS A LIAR. I've finished my entire lunch and literally my stomach is rumbling. I wonder how Kate manages to smile when she's about to pass out? (need to work on that one) 

1:15- Broke down and went to target for some Low Fat string cheese. Feel guilty for eating it. Decide to compartmentalize and put the guilt in the back of my mind. 

2:30- I was supposed to just have yogurt now. I had a yogurt and another egg. 

3-4:29- counting the minutes til my 4:30 snack.

4:30- string cheese. at this point, i'm pretty sure it's better than most sex i've ever had.

5:30- writing blog about being Kate Middleton. Wondering if it's worth it. Holy fuck balls, i'm definitely going to pass out. Leaving work, grabbing another egg, peeing for the 101st time today. 

How does she do it? 

Ready for day 2. If i live.